To Be On Purpose

Quote of the day: “People usually consider walking on water or in thin air a miracle. But I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or in thin air, but to walk on earth. Every day we are engaged in a miracle which we don't even recognize: a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black, curious eyes of a child -- our own two eyes. All is a miracle.” - Thich Nhat Hanh

Over the past few days I’ve picked up a book that had been sitting on my nightstand for months now, to give it another read. It’s “A New Earth,” by Eckhart Tolle. I was introduced to the works of Eckhart like many others through his first novel, “The Power of Now.” I read it around eight years ago and it had a tremendous impact on me. I am a different person because of it.

“A New Earth” also provided a shift in me and my conscious. How could it not, though I haven’t looked at the text in a few years. After reading just a few pages the other night, I am thankfully in remembrance of some powerful messages—one being the “pain body.” I am not going to get into the details of Eckhart’s teachings here and his description of the pain body, but I do want to comment on my relationship with my pain body and how it is impacting me today on this journey.

I notice I fall victim to my pain body all too often, meaning, I physically, emotionally and mentally become attached to negative states of being. I get so wrapped up in them that I believe that I’ve become them. I struggle to see me separate from the pain, stress, worry, hate, fear, drama, pressure…all of it. It doesn’t take long for me to then feel consumed by these negative states as if they are me.

The “pain body” craves the drama, the negative states. It feeds off them. It’s very seductive and powerful.

This is why I continue to feel like I’ve lost my “Self.” In truth, I’ve never been lost. The essence of me has always remained within the stillness, underneath the drama and in between thoughts. This Self is the one I am always looking for but normally mistake for the one caught up in all the noise.

Today I’ve observed me from a witness view. Again, this is part of Eckhart’s teachings. He speaks of the witness being the real you, the truth of you, the essence of you…who you are in unscripted, undefined terms. I witnessed myself getting wrapped up in a number of annoyances, frustrations, concerns and dramas. Some of which were small, others of which were large. Regardless, I was aware of it happening.

I didn’t judge or berate myself for getting pulled into the drama. I just noticed it. And I noticed how charged the drama can be.

These observances today are simply observances. I don’t expect I’ll suddenly be able to remain detached from the pain body. But through the awareness of feeling my Self as separate from the pain body, even when I was getting pulled in, I’m feeling more and more like myself, today. And with that, I recognize the beauty of the blue sky; the warmth of the sun; and the joy in the being.
It is always in the being that we can begin to do what we are destined to. Today feels like square one. Going back to the drawing board, only, there is no drawing to do. There is only being. No more appointments at the moment. No more networking to be had, today. Just being…on purpose.